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Saturday, December 24, 2011

Just plain determined to be right - Officer

Dispatch sends me a call.  The essentials boil down to a dispute over a parking stall in a large grocery store parking lot.  2 vehicles were coming from opposite directions and saw a vehicle begin to back out of the stall.  Both the waiting vehicles put their turn signals on indicating they were waiting for the spot, so what it came to was which way the vehicle backed out, there in, blocking one from getting the spot. 

To the victor go the spoils is the old saying.  Well, our caller won the spot.  Apparently the other driver drove off, seeking a parking spot elsewhere.  Unbeknownst to our caller, the supposed loser went back to the caller's car and wrote in the dust on the back of her car, "I CAN'T DRIVE!"  Our caller saw this and was infuriated.  She called the police from the parking lot, alleging vandalism.  We had no units to respond.  She then drove home and called insisting a unit be sent.  No units available.  A little while longer, and she calls a third time, demanding an officer be sent now, or she will drive to the police station.

I had just cleared a call, running calls back to back and was ready for a little code 7 action (lunch) when dispatch tags me before I could go out in my hidy hole.  Dispatch is very frustrated with the caller, and would like me to investigate a misuse of 911.  I head over to the caller's address and see her pulling out of her driveway and into the street, apparently tired of waiting and in route to the station.  She sees lucky little ol' me, and backs into her driveway. 

I make contact and during the course of the investigation, determine our hapless caller has a suspended driver's license and should not be driving.  I also determine there is no damage to the car, only embarrassment.  I further establish she has no follow up information regarding the would be vandal, and also that in addition to her driving suspended, she has no insurance.

I issue her a citation for driving suspended and no insurance, about $900.00 in tickets, and tell her I will write up her complaint.  I further advised her about the misuse of 911.  She is outraged.  She starts yelling about how she called and a crime was committed against her.  I calmly explain that in light of all of the information, with my learning that there was no damage to the vehicle, that her license was suspended and she had no insurance, that according to her driver record, she is a habitual offender and had a list of violations encompassing almost 3 pages, that what the woman wrote on the back of her car was not only the truth, but a public service announcement, and we can't prosecute that!


Dawn said...

And I thought junk like that only happened in Tennessee.......

Dave Bennett said...

This is so funny! Sometimes I feel bad for the cops because they have to deal with the scumbags of the earth. But I guess you get to balance that out with stories like this. Thanks for the laugh!

I wonder if this is the same lady I saw on TV. When a policeman pulled her over for speeding, she went ballistic, screaming "I'm sick and tired of you giving me speeding tickets. How do you expect me to pay for all these tickets! I don't have that kind of money! etc."

Lauren Marie said...

I would so high-five you for this if I could.

Jake said...

Beautiful!! My wife had to tell me to shut up because I was laughing so hard at this story.

Bandaged One said...

WOW, that is great! I love it!